thoughts

How to Discover your Passion and Purpose

How to find your purpose

If you want to live passionately with purpose and reason, then you need to access the traits of your very own being. You need to listen to and respond to your emotions, as you navigate your way through different experiences in life.

The journey into fulfilment begins with mindful experiences. You must be and feel fully engaged, in each and every experience you encounter. You must be completely invested and emotionally present through every experience, to determine what speaks to your identity and what doesn’t.

I’ve come across too many irritated individuals living life on auto-pilot, complacent in routine and living numbly. I know this feeling because I used to live this way; a life not worth living, lacking fulfilment and wasted potential.

We’re all beings with untapped potential and within us is the determination and drive to become all that we aspire to be. If you’re noticing that life seems to be passing you by, then you just need to regain control and pay attention to what your emotions are telling you.

Throughout my life, the one lesson I’ve relied upon to stay on track with my aspirations, is to listen and pay attention to emotion. Emotions indicate your truest intent and genuine desires, therefore ignoring how you feel will only lead you into an unfulfilled life and further away from discovering your passion and purpose. A deception that will blur your identity and cause you to drift away from what you truly desire.

Thought vs. Emotion

You can change and manipulate thought, even if a negative thought enters your mind you can counteract it with a positive one almost instantaneously. To demonstrate: if I ask you to think of a Lemon, you can do that without effort. Now if I ask you to think of a Red Lemon, you can also do so instantaneously and change the perception of reality within your own mind.

As thoughts can be manipulated, altered and misdirected so easily, what you think you want, may not necessarily be what you truly want. This is why it’s incredibly important to pay close attention to emotion in order to maintain control over your life. Your emotions are like truth-tellers, they can help you navigate your life towards the bliss you’re in search of, and into the fulfillment you desire. I can’t tell you to be happy because we’re not really capable of altering emotion like we can thought. If you want to change your emotions, then you may have to change your reality.

In Summary

To discover your passion and to find your purpose in life, you must pay attention to emotion. Your thoughts may rationalize a negative experience, however we cannot fully trust thought as our thoughts can easily be manipulated and influenced. However we cannot deceive emotion, therefore as you navigate through life’s experiences, pay attention to what you're feeling. If you find that an experience contains no emotional fulfillment, then move on and keep experiencing until you discover the fulfillment you seek. Until you uncover your passion and define your purpose.

VanCity

Meditation, what a trip!

Meditation

I've been meditating on and off for many months now and I’ve recently become more disciplined. I’ve been dedicated every day for the last two months and I’m noticing an increased sense of peace of mind and I’m finding it easier to maintain a positive mindset and focus.

I feel that I enter a semi-conscious state when I meditate, a place where extreme reality meets extreme wonder. My troubles and difficulties dance with my hopes and dreams, until the two realities co-exist and become one, which I define as truth. When I arrive at this truth, balance and serenity is achieved, relinquishing fear and doubt. Meditation allows me to pick myself up and confidently continue work towards my aspirations.

It sounds beautiful and poetic ‘n all, but I’m still eager to experience this “awakening” that I keep hearing about. However, I think last night I came incredibly close to experiencing something I can only describe as sensational.

Last night I prepared as normal: my clothes were warm and loose, I sat crossed legged and began breathing deeply, in and out. With the amount of practise, I’ve gotten closer to perfecting a technique that settles my mind quickly; I tend to focus on the sound of my breath.

After the serene dance between two realities, I experienced something very different and I couldn’t feel my body. It didn’t feel like I had lost the sense to touch, it was more like that feeling you get when you hold your hands really close together, without them actually touching. Maybe it was brought on by sitting crossed legged for such a long time, but it wasn’t a numbness, nor did I feel the tingling of pins and needles. It was very bizarre.

I wouldn’t call it an out-of-body experience, I’m still skeptical of that, but I did sense that my mind was lost and trying to navigate itself somewhere. I felt as if a veil or layer of something had been dropped and it caused my physical senses to weaken and my thoughts to escape rather than silence.

Was I experiencing awe?

A moment frozen in time?

Was I awake in my sleep?

I had no idea, but I reckon it could’ve been an experience of complete and genuine detachment. It felt like I had officially let go of something, more accurately, I felt I let go of everything and that I had finally accepted some sort of peace. Needless to say it was comforting yet peculiar.

When I awoke, I awoke with an incredible awareness of consciousness. I seemed to magnetically re-attach to everything I had let go of: the fear, the hope, the good, the bad, the sadness and joy…I felt like I was a giant electro-magnet surrounded by an assortment of metals, which had been switched back on.

I’m still unsure of what this all means, but it’s definitely contributing to the case for meditation and its role in awareness and positive impacts to mindset. It’s a personal, self-driven influence over your own identity, it’s taught me more about myself and it’s helping me better understand my place.

I highly recommend it to you all.

Image Credit: digitalbob8

VanCity

How to Master Your Own Mind: 5 Ways to Maintain Control

post by, VanCityLifeCoach.com

Mind

Over the last few weeks I took a break from writing and I spent time with family whom had visited me from England. I wanted to be present during each moment as they were only here for a short while. I didn't want to escape a moment to experience gratitude. Life is about balance and prior to them arriving, I had spent most of my time working towards my own passions and building my career; I had severely separated from a crucial part of my identity and neglected the very support that kept me grounded. My family visiting me was an opportunity to reconnect.

The last time I had spent this much time away from my writing, was when I suffered a severe case of doubt and fed the belief that I wasn't really good enough. The difference this time, I was in full control of my own mind, I mindfully stepped away from work because I knew what I needed to. When you become so passionate about something and push through the negative infiltrations, fear transitions from not feeling good enough, to the fear of losing what you’ve built. Spending the last few years developing my own mindset and pulling myself out of unprogressive thoughts, has taught me that I can’t live life motivated by fear. I can harness it to trigger motivation, but I cannot allow my life to be driven by it. Today I proclaim to live life awake, aware and in abundance; I’m learning to master my own mind.

#1.  Objectify your Thoughts

A habit I’ve been getting into, is evaluating and reflecting negative and destructive thought. Whenever my thoughts turn sour, whether it’s about myself or negatively towards others, I dance around it with thoughts of understanding. I’m not simply replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, as far as I’m concerned, there’s a long line separating the two. What I choose to educate myself with to interpret thought, is what keeps my mind balanced and still.

When a thought enters my mind that causes me personal conflict, I acknowledge it. I make myself fully aware that I’m experiencing some sort of disconnect with my own identity and it’s time to evaluate and reflect. I personally externalize the thought, put it on a piece of paper and begin to understand how I came to such a negative assumption. When you decode these thoughts, you begin to weaken their impact, almost like repeating a word over and over again, until it no longer sounds like a word.

We often give certain thoughts more power than others, usually the negative ones get the most attention; like how a baby gains more attention by kicking and screaming. By making yourself aware of thoughts, you begin to question them, you’ll circle around different thoughts with questions; theories and ideas, until you stumble on the truth. And you’ll know when you've reached this "aha" moment, because you’ll feel very much empowered.

#2. Conceptualize Perception

Nothing feels more real than entering a flow state. When working on something you're passionate about, the world around you seems to flutter away as you engage your inner genius, as your heart, mind and body is working in full synchronicity. If you regularly engage a flow state, you’ll become increasingly aware of how blurry perception can be. This is my 123rd blog post, I’m 7 chapters into writing my first book and I have invested countless hours a day talking about what I’m passionate about. Each time I come out of a state of flow, the world around me seems that much more distorted.

I’ve learnt to conceptualize perception, for one, I don’t waste time on what people think. It’s impossible for me to know what thoughts are motivating other people’s perception of the world, without spending time to get to know and understand them first. When you’re negatively impacted by others, you’re often focused on one recurring, internal thought. You’re boomeranging your own thoughts as you convince yourself that everyone shares it.

Don’t be naïve, focus more on doing the things that engage your passions and fill your life with bliss. If at every moment you’re engaging in an activity or thought that doesn’t fulfill you, you blur your perception of reality even more. Life becomes complicated and you’ll find yourself scrambling to understand why you don’t fit in.

#3. Experience Detachment

For the longest time I’ve been trying to understand the term detachment, that I failed to practise it. It’s not letting anything have rule over your life that'll steer you away from truth. In my opinion, detachment is more of an experience rather than a practise, it allows you to experience liberation like never before. Imagine; complete and utter freedom and no rule from thought, desire, emotion, people and even your own possessions.

I always say detachment feels the same as taking your clothes off in public, you have nothing left to hide as you strip away everything you’ve ever held onto, that kept you from exposing the most vulnerable part of who you are; your truest form. Detachment finally allows you to exist, uninterrupted nor influenced. Detachment guides you to peace of mind.

To start experiencing this today, begin to understand your relationship with everything you give meaning to, starting with your material possessions is the easiest way to begin. Evaluate your desire for these things, ask yourself why? Question the very purpose of how things define your life, not your lifestyle. The more rule you have over your life, the more rule you have over your mind. The more you latch onto things, people, desires, and thoughts and so on, you weaken your mind because you deter from what’s truly meaningful.

#4. Awaken your Imagination

Ever had a crazy thought, idea or put together an insane, out of this world theory and shrugged it off as silliness because you’d think people would think you’re insane, paranoid or just stupid? Yeah me too, but there is so much fun to be had if you just let your imagination roar. Regularly exercise your mind by freeing it from the shackles of reality, I always note down my "insanity" and store it in a folder called "Chaos".

Your imagination is vital to unlocking your potential, eventually one of your ideas, or crumbs from several ideas will guide you to self-actualization. If you let your mind regularly do its thing, you’ll eventually stumble across something you’ll feel confident expressing.

Why compartmentalize your imagination to fit in with the current trends and ideologies when, the advances we have in the world today came from the individuals often once thought to be insane. The world isn’t flat, the earth revolves around the sun and society is finally coming to terms with the fact that, we may not be the only ones living in this universe.

Imagination leads to discovery.

#5 Open your Mind

Last but not least, be curious, because when your mind opens up, you give fear the opportunity to escape. Connect with engaging stimulus; read more books, listen to more people and accept more fact. Try new things daily and test old practises rigorously. If you want to advance your mind, you need to stimulate it with something new. Expand zones of comfort and never be afraid to understand something by asking questions.

I grew up around warped cultural traditions that caused prejudice and inequality, the moment I moved away from it, was the day I began to discover my identity and my place in the world. And never hold anyone else back either, especially if you haven’t gained the experience or exposure to conceive any genuine opinion. This is your life remember, it’s up to you to discover what it’ll be about.

VanCity

What is Mindfulness? - The Philosophy of “I don’t give a damn Sh*t”

I have very cool parents. A father with the ability to dream big, despite life’s knock backs, the man still has some big aspirations. His encouragement is limitless and he has every confidence that, no matter what I do, I’ll be okay.

My mother on the other hand, she lives by one philosophy which she insists on passing down through generations. A guru in her own right, my mother never ever gave a "damn sh*t!” We, we being myself and my siblings, all used to laugh at her funny sayings, this one in particular.

My parents grew up in a generation surrounded by very strict Indian traditions and extremely outdated cultural practices. Also, one of the first generations to genuinely experience the struggles of integrating into a western society, from racial prejudice through to raising children who had adopted very different values to those she and my father were raised with.

An avid reader, my mum grew up reading books on philosophy, psychology, and spirituality. She generally read anything that allowed her mind to explore, to escape the realities she was forced to surrender to. All our lives, during the troubles that came with financial turmoil, crooked family politics and the bullsh*t that came with living an arranged life, she never let her spirit die.

We all grew up hearing “I don’t give a damn Sh*t!” around the house, as she belted it out during stressful moments. In her charming in-glish accent (an Indian accent with an English undertone), followed by a delightful laugh that made any unfortunate situation seem small and insignificant. It’s only during the last few years, having figured out my own path in life, I connected with what mum actually meant by the words she uttered.

My mum has practised mindfulness her entire life, before the world began trending it, mum was living it. In every difficult situation, she would never let negativity infiltrate her mind. It was like this mantra shielded her from turning into a bitter old lady; resenting the world and everyone in it.

I always thought she held onto a hope that things would get better one day, as many do in unfortunate circumstances. I thought that was where she drew her strength. In actuality, that one-day was always her present day, the here and now was the time to laugh off her troubles and focus on whatever bliss currently existed, however big or small. Be it the fact that we had a day with a full healthy meal on our plates or, at the very least, love and closeness in our family.

Today, at 64, mum continues to share lessons of mindfulness to any person she meets. It makes complete sense why people warm up to her very quickly. She lives life as if life is literally the only thing she owns, and so long as she maintains control over her own mind, the force that drives her life, she’s the most fortunate person she knows.

So no matter what situation you’re faced with, no matter what your current circumstances are, practise having full control over your mind and be aware of your thoughts. That’s what mindfulness is. Mum taught us to focus on everyday bliss, however big or small, it exists, we just have to start paying attention to it.

Negativity can only affect us if we allow it to and what mum actually means by ‘not giving a sh*t’, isn’t that she doesn’t care, it’s that she’ll continue to fight for the one thing that can’t ever be taken from her; she will never surrender her mind to negativity, no matter how hard life tries.

This post was written by Terry Sidhu.

Are you ready to reach your true potential?

How to Succeed with Confidence - Share Your Personal Life with Your Personal Life.

The day life really changed for me was the day I decided to expose my soul to the people around me.

I finally let out those ideas that I had kept quiet, knowing that keeping them to myself only held back my dreams. When I shared my work publicly, I was able to pursue my ideas confidently and I was ready to take on the perceived judgment and ridicule that once held me back.

It was that day everyone understood who I was and what I stood for.

The day I uttered the words "F*** it" and just poured my heart into my passions, was the day my identity was freed and life became exciting again and I let those passions lead the direction of my life.

I finally decided to accomplish the things I really wanted for my life.

Mindset

I've dreamed big since I was a kid and the day I made my life a priority and shared my identity with those around me, was the day I began pulling that dream into the realm of reality.

Something insanely good happens when you decide to let those dreams out. All of a sudden I knew what I wanted, I was able to understand others much clearer, I became much more instinctive and learned to make quicker decisions for myself.

I was able grow and learn again. Just like it used to be when I was a kid, I was becoming naturally drawn to things that piqued my interest, learn something new and actually understand it.

My dating life even progressed from quantity over to quality, I became content being single and I learned to know what I expect from a relationship (Click here and you can read all about it).

Most importantly, It highlighted the people in my life who really supported me. I began getting the encouragement to pursue my passion, it was support I thought hadn't existed.

I became so dedicated to my writing that negative influence's faded away. I've noticed how people give me constructed advice now and think twice about sharing empty opinions, they know that I'm sticking by myself, thus prepared for anything thrown my way.

I promise you, you'll release yourself from living a life you're not fulfilled by, on the day you decide to share your personal life with your personal life, that day you'll become free to confidently pursue the life you crave and succeed at it.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

The power of having a very clear vision and what that vision does for you.

Vision It's currently 1:30am as I write this post. I've been tossing and turning in my bed for about 3 hours now. You'd think I'd be out cold considering I've been up since 5am from the previous day, but I'm Wide awake. My minds been racing as if I'm trying to tell my self something.

I cannot sleep. Just before bed I had finished painting the picture of how my life's going to turn out. I've done this hundreds of times but I had never lost any sleep because if it. This time a wave of inspiration hit me like the cold air that's currently circulating around my body.

The odd thing is, the thoughts tormenting my sleep have nothing to do with anything I had just researched for my future. I found myself thinking about life and relationships, I began getting flashbacks of experiences and memories that I always turn too, when I seek the guidance and motivation to continue to do what I do.

Now, I also have no idea why I'm smiling from ear to ear, either my mind is reminding me of what I can achieve or my ambition is being triggered by my past successes.

As I sit here typing away, in my dark room, the light from my laptop screen  illuminates the keys I need to write this message, only now my mind is finally beginning to feel still.

I think I figured  it out.

That clear vision I have of becoming a successful writer and that vision I have of inspiring millions with my words, they're being satisfied. Like a hungry child crying out to be fed, the only reason I'm able to focus on this (as I write) the reason my mind is now calming, is because I'm satisfying the needs of the visions I hold.

How weird is that. I'm still trying to process what just happened but it all makes complete sense. I hadn't written anything since Sunday so it's like my universe is giving me a cosmic kick up the backside.

Tonight I actually understand more than ever; the power of having a very clear vision and what that vision does for you.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Live Your Dream: If You Have Time To Think, You Have Time To Act.

Clapper If I had the power, I would remove the need to require sleep, because just before bed my mind is always racing from all the ideas that I want to plan and put into action. I want to start researching and gathering information to make all my ideas a reality. If it weren’t for knowing that I have to sleep, I’d probably be up every single night taking action, making plans and igniting powerful energy towards a promising outcome. Nevertheless, I keep a pen and paper handy or my trusty Smartphone to jot down every idea that comes to mind, just so that my thoughts won’t run into a web of randomness and unorganized nonsense and so that I can get some much-needed shut-eye and look into my notes as soon as possible.

I overheard a conversation the other day, it was a couple of guys talking about a small business idea they had. It was just a simple idea that if researched enough, it could have proved successful for them. Here’s the thing, although spending all this time during their coffee break discussing an idea, they never spent one moment to act upon it. In that very short space of time they could have researched so much about their idea and they could have answered many of the questions they had. They could have looked into the feasibility of making their dream a reality; all it would have taken was a couple of Google searches to get the ball rolling. Unfortunately, like many others out there, they decided to pay for their coffee and return to work and ended off their conversation “if only we had the money” and walked away feeling intimidated by the very thought of making things happen.

I’m calling bullshit on this excuse. If they had 30 minutes to talk about an idea, dreaming up the potential lifestyles they could be living, they could have spent a good chunk of that 30 minutes looking into viable options towards making their dream a reality. Always remember, small actions that you take today can impact heavily on your future. If I had never opened up my laptop and wrote my first blog post, I wouldn’t be working on my book today. My excuse was always “I don’t have the time and I don’t know how to write.” Look at me now, I’m definitely a better writer now than I was then and now I can officially say to people “I’m a blogger!” I always anticipated that I’d be in this position today but never really expected it to happen and it all started out by taking small actions.

Many people forget that the most successful people they admire started off by taking small actions towards their dreams. Evidence can be found in the story behind any person you consider successful. Sir Allen Sugar started out selling products from the back of a van, Mark Zuckerberg started coding in his spare time, heck, even Beyoncé started out by singing in her back garden - look at where they are now and when the day comes to tell my story: I’ll say I started writing to kill time on a graveyard shift.

The examples are endless but the key to living any dream is to take action. Small steps towards success can lead to giant leaps towards your dreams. If you have the time to think about it you have the time to act on it! Remember, a vital component towards achieving anything in life is taking the steps to make things happen.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Avoid Becoming the Bad Apple - Break the Cycle That Breeds Irritated Souls

It still irritates me to see how many people are afraid to say or admit what it is they want or wanted out of life. They bury their dreams and continue on with life with the mentality that “it wasn’t meant to be” or that “it will never happen” and they will share this view with anyone else that has the balls to actually go for it.  The ones that adopt the same mentality will carry on this cycle and continue to fill the world with irritated souls with lost dreams. Adopting this attitude will only distance yourself from the life you’ve always dreamed of.

Despite what others have said, I had managed to push on and continued to pursue my goals and passions because I was never afraid to say what I would accomplish. Being able to say what it is I wanted got me to where I am today and to the distances I will go tomorrow. I remember my year 11 science teacher saying to me that I wouldn’t make it to sixth form let alone obtain a degree. I remember my friends laughing at me when they said I wouldn’t make it out of my hometown when I said I will be living abroad one day. I remember relatives saying my goals were too ambitious and that I needed to ground myself and live in the real world.

Now if I had listened to them I would have probably stopped believing in myself and end up as another irritated soul waiting for something to happen and trying to make ends meet in the ‘real world’. I may have just waited for someone to save me from an irritated life to just sit and wait until I venture onto the right path. Well that’s what I saw of the ‘real world’ and the people in it, what people said I shrugged off as hearsay, what right did they have to determine my life for me? I couldn’t understand their advice so I couldn’t adopt it. There’s this bizarre mistake that the majority of people make, they try to fit their lives into an idea of what success is and what success looks like because no one ever told them that we determine our own success. Not many people had the guts to say to me “that will definitely work” or “Terry, you will get what you want” for any support that I did receive there was always a slight hesitation with a concerned undertone and you’ve probably heard these words before, they go along the lines of “good luck” and “I wish you all the best”.

Whenever you dream and share that dream with others, voices of negativity will always tell you not to pursue it. Discourage you from believing and placing doubt on your passion. I had so much of that growing up; even to this day many people still cast this negative shadow, despite my successes. I have come to terms with what others do not understand and I have come to terms with why others have such opinions. However I will refuse to come to terms with closing the door to my ambition and turning my back on my dreams, to reiterate, they got me this far and they’ll carry me further and I urge you to follow your dreams and encourage others too. Break the cycle that breeds irritated souls and aim to live in a more fulfilled world.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Understanding Fear and the Fear in Decision Making

Decision We’re always faced with making big decisions; decisions that shape our lives and decisions we make that affect others around us. In such situations we often seek out advice, but often enough our advisers turn into influencers. Just like consultants, we trust that their steering us down the right path because we lack knowledge or skill. So we can often get misguided by placing our trust in others or dismiss good advice completely because of past experiences...

...and on this other hand if we’re not seeking advice, we’re battling against our own experiences and instincts, we rely on what we already know to help aid our decisions. Good or bad, our past has a big influence over our future, previous failures and successes determine the size of risk we're willing to take. We play by odds and a battle between heart and mind commences.

All my life I’ve gone with my instinct and followed my passions - it's what I trust the most, but now and again my instincts get overwhelmed and my passions are taken aback when faced with big, often life altering decisions. I lose trust in my own instinct, or not notice what it's telling me because of all the uncertainty.

Now normally I would battle on and power through a swaying decision until I uncover the answer, but I've learned over and over that there is no time to sit and wait - by doing so major opportunities maybe missed and I’m to be left with regret.

Making quick decisions is a skill you develop when you trust yourself. If you doubt yourself you begin to lose that trust, you lose that trust then you'll live in fear; fear of failure.

To help me out I did what I rarely do, I took a break from my existence. In order to process my thoughts and figure out what I wanted, I had to escape everyone and everything for a moment so that I can re-enter my life definitive. Up until this point I was hit with so many persuasions (both internal and external), I didn't know whether to fight or flight or where to draw arguments from; it was intimidating.

So, I turned off my cell phone, packed a bottle of water and literally went on a hike. I didn't even pack my i-pod, music motivates my mood and I didn't want to be influenced by anything. I journeyed to a familiar spot so that I wouldn’t get distracted by a new environment and I hiked towards a solitary place overlooking the city. From there I just sat with my bottle of water and only had my mind to keep me company, something that is often difficult to do in today’s society, but I processed the hell out of my thoughts.

It was refreshing but it was difficult. For the first 20 minutes or so I kept thinking about all the time I was wasting, the time that could be better spent investing in more productive projects. Focusing on the stuff I needed to get done, thinking I should have brought my laptop along and missing my I-pod. It was like my mind was in rush hour and my thoughts were stuck in traffic; I wasn't getting anywhere but I was very eager to move on from them.

I continued to sit there and my mind eventually rested, I began thinking of the most random things, bizarre memories would just make their way forward and somehow I was taken back to the very first time I visited New York City; the excitement and the motivation that I felt back then. I remembered how ridiculously naive I was and how little I knew about the world and about life in general and yet, remember feeling like I could rule the world – I wasn't scared because I had no other choice but to take control and let my identity lead the way.

It was then I realized that my indecisiveness came from fear and my theory is: fear is a reaction to the lack of control. I had lost complete control over a decision, which is why I feared making it. Fear also starts a war between the physiological and the psychological which is why you’re only really presented with the fight or flight option and i choose believe that’s bulls***, therefore I present to you my loop hole.

When you’re struck with fear and a difficult decision, take the time to just escape for a moment, not completely but just for a moment, re-align yourself with your goals to regain control, to turn the situation around to your advantage and face your decision with your life insight.

Like me it may take some reminding of what you want or gained from life, others it may mean educating yourself more for a better understanding. Whichever way you can regain control, allow yourself to break away into thought to figure a way out of doubt. It allowed me to fully understand the decision I needed to make, it was as if I could see the light bulb flashing above my head and everything suddenly became crystal clear - I came to my own conclusion to overcome the conflict and made my decision. I restored trust back into my instincts.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach