confident

Become More Confident: The Confidence and Curiosity Cycle

Image

Curiosity boosting confidence – the most enriched people I've come across show signs of being able to boost confidence by delving into curiosity. Confidence grows as you continue to understand who you are and what you want, therefore when curiosity is explored you learn that much more about yourself, what you like and don’t like, if you are good at something or not – curiosity opens areas of your own person you never thought or believed existed. The scary part is you need to have the guts to plunge into it first, which is how confidence allows you to be more curious.

Achieve a result: When you finally dive into exploring curiosity, the biggest challenge is seeing it through; people fall at the first hurdle and it tends to negatively impact their confidence. So even though you may have just begun to explore, you need to push yourself until you achieve some sort of result in order for you to gain confidence. Otherwise, you may end up letting yourself down, leading to self doubt – which is how curiosity can negatively impact confidence.

 Confidence allowing us to be curious - Think about when you embarked on something new for the first time: like a job/new business, an extreme sport, even travelling on your own for the first time. Certain triggers led you there, the fears and anxieties often spark your curiosity, maybe it sparked an interest, maybe you saw someone else’s courage or maybe, you know what it will do to your own self-esteem if you ventured into curious territory. These triggers open up your mind, you want to learn and know more so you build confidence by gaining a level of understanding first – often leading to research and assessment. Others, on the other hand, can jump right in based on what they may already know or have experienced. Either way, you go through these steps in order to ease the pressure of the pursuit. As they say – knowledge is power and with this confidence you’re more likely to take a chance.

Take action: When you build your confidence to a level of allowing yourself to be curious - be curious and discover. I’ve noticed I can only build confidence when I pair it with action. You’ll notice that when you bump into people who only appear to be confident, it’s because they cannot pair action/evidence to what they appear to know.

The drawback and gain: When the cycle is fully deployed and you didn't gain the results you had expected, you can still leave with the peace of mind of knowing you had explored unknown/unfamiliar territory. Relishing in the fact you gained some sort of knowledge and understanding something you may never have understood before - be it about yourself or anything else. Although you may struggle to repeat the cycle again so soon, you will do so with more caution and preparation. Going through the whole cycle with a positive outcome, you will only become more curious and more confident or vice versa, and as you repeat the process over and over you will gain knowledge and understanding of whom you are which can only work wonders for your own self-esteem.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

 

Why Confident Men, Turn Women On.

Lads, we’ve been trying to figure this one out for ages but when it comes down to it, it really is all about confidence. First of all let’s not mistake confidence for cockiness. I think most women are put off if you’re acting like a douche. I guess confidence is assurance to women? Even women, who won’t admit it, expect to feel safe and secure around their blokes. I don’t mean by brawn and looks, although that’s what some women do look for, but apparently there is so much more. To feel safe and secure could mean the ability to provide, to be a good father, to be faithful, to be honest, to be loyal, to be spiritual, to be successful...what feeling safe and secure means to a woman is definitely individual to her. So when a woman see’s a level of confidence in a man, I guess she becomes open to seeing what he has to offer and is curious as to why. If what you have is what she’s looking for, then for lack of a better term, you’re in!

Do not be afraid to take charge of your own confidence and don't allow other people to determine your confidence for you. If your mate is acting one way to get the girl it doesn't mean you have to work the same program, despite what some girls think, we know we’re not all the same and neither are they, so don’t be anyone else. You might have that fear of rejection and to be rejected is like kryptonite to your level of confidence, it’s not that uncommon.

However, if you feel you can step up and be the man that she’s looking for then you need to prove it. Have you ever looked at a woman and thought that you could be everything she ever wanted? That’s what I’m talking about; if you’re thinking that confidently, you’re going to have to act that way too. I know for some it’s easier said than done but it bears thinking about. Also, believe it or not women are even looking at how you handle rejection it’s a tell-tale sign of the type of person you are.

You know when you see that chubby 280 lbs guy with that babe on his arm and you think to yourself “how did he get her?” So, when you actually listen to women, it’s almost never about physical looks. Yes, a level of physical attraction is important, but if you can offer her what she wants, then you’re the sexiest person around. Rumor has it that the more confident we are the better we look, who knew?

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach