We don’t honor ourselves enough. You and I are designed to accomplish great things, we’re built to withstand tough challenges and we each have a unique purpose for being here. We do ourselves a great dishonor whenever we allow anything, or anyone for that matter, convince us that we’re not worthy enough or that it’s not possible for us to follow our true calling in life.
We often talk of purpose as if it’s some cosmic gift from above or some declaration that society hands us and because of this thinking, we never feel like we’re quite good enough unless someone else affirms it. We’re constantly doubting ourselves and we’re seeking validation through notifications to which hold no real value. We diminish our self-belief because we’re not seeing purpose as a natural birthright; we’re to own who we are and to be free to explore life, so that we can grow into our purpose and courageously stand by it.
What I’ve written already may sound a little cryptic, but I’ve recently experienced a shift in perspective and discovered why so many of us struggle in our daily lives. A lot of us don’t feel supported enough to share how we truly feel and therefore we burden ourselves with our truths rather than opening up about them. We then learn to cope with our burdens instead of overcoming them and we hide away our truths under a guise of denial; resentment; anger; sadness; frustration; silence; avoidance and so on, always a guise nonetheless. I’d bet that many of you feel misunderstood, but that feeling isn't going to shift until you drop the guise, set free your truth and allow the healing to begin.
Too many of us are good people working hard and trying even harder to build happy and fulfilled lives. Even at our lowest of lows, we muster whatever energy we have left and rise out of bed in the morning to live through another day. I’ve coached enough people to understand that this statement resonates within a lot of us, as it did with me for a very long time. I’ll even admit that I’ve thought about ending all this despair too, because if I can’t live openly then for me there’s no reason to live at all.
I grew up in a Sikh household and the very first words that appear in the Guru Granth Sahib (the Sikh holy text) are “Ik Onkar, Sat Naam” which roughly translates to: There is one God, Truth is his name. Now anyone reading this believing that there is a mystical being in the sky shaping our lives really hasn’t understood what this ancient teaching is trying to clue us into. The only thing we should live our lives by and the very thing we should actually honor, seek out, respect and worship is the truth. It really is that simple.
It’s said that the truth will set us free and my God does it ever. Think about it, the reason why many of us feel isolated or alone, outcast or trapped, or even misunderstood and lacking purpose is because we’re not living truthfully. We lock up how we truly feel; who we truly are; what we truly desire from life because we’re too attached to mass produced ideologies that misrepresent us. Our attachment to these ideologies cause us to judge one another as we’re conditioned to follow each other like sheep and lead the same old meaningless lives over and over and over again. You and I are worth so much more than that and if you ever want to get over your burdens, you need to liberate yourself from them and live life with integrity, if you genuinely want to feel like you matter.
The day I felt self-realized and more confident was the day I decided to live true to my nature and embrace the very traits that make my identity as exceptional as the mind I have. Just as exceptional as you are with the remarkable mind you have. So I’ve decided to write this post today to encourage you all to free yourself from any burden you feel buried under, because you are way too valuable to live your life in vain.
You all know me as Terry but not many know that my true name Is Talwinder Singh Sidhu, a name that I’ve only recently learnt to be proud of and respect. I believe we are all born equal in an unequal society and the only way we’re going to make positive change, is if we stand up and continue to fight for equality on all platforms. On that note, I’ve also recently accepted that gender isn’t a factor for me when it comes to relationships and sexual attraction. However, sometimes I’m not even attracted to anyone at all and although you may associate me with a specific label (trust me I’ve tried on many) I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m free-sexual and so are you. Furthermore, in any relationship albeit personal, professional or intimate, I only hold onto people who have crystal clear integrity, so you can imagine how long it took for me to build a positive relationship with myself. I don’t believe in God, well not in the traditional manner anyway. I do believe in rebirth and I reckon evolution is a profound indication of it. I no longer fear people who judge, because I know those who do judge ultimately fear being judged themselves. I know I’m really good at what I do because I’ve accepted that there is always so much more to learn. Lastly, I believe that every single one of us on this planet is destined for greatness, but only those who live truthfully will achieve it.
Living with integrity will help you uncover your purpose and give you the courage to pursue it, because you’ll no longer feel bound to the same life design everyone else is following. Your relationships will improve because you’ll only support ones that are mutually supportive and as a bonus, your tolerance for ignorance will increase too. Finally, when you do step out from underneath your guise, you’ll finally give people the opportunity to understand you fully. Although it can seem incredibly terrifying at first and there may be some 'consequences' to face, in time you will realize that you'll have nothing left to fear and that freedom will get you to wherever it is you need to be.
I’m going to march on forward with my own life now and continue to live each day trying to fulfill my purpose, because when the time comes to guide the next generation, I’ll do so with pride, honor and without regret.