We construct our goals and our life missions based on the very traits of our own identity. We seek the things we like and love, and work towards eliminating anything negative. We propel our lives forward by desire and in search of fulfillment, so why settle for anything less in relationships?
There’s a list of things in my life that I rarely like to talk about, relationships feature prominently on that list. For those who know me personally, know that I’m very focused on what I want from life, but when it comes to relationships I find myself always changing my mind.
I don’t know why and maybe it’s just me, but the intimacy and connection one can create with another is difficult to put into words. It’s an experience to live rather than a discussion to have; each relationship is as individual as the people who make them.
Hand on heart, I consider myself lucky to have experienced this phenomena first hand, even though it was short lived, it left a lasting impression on my life. It changed my entire point of view on what it means to be connected to another person.
You see, it was never about how she smiled or how she did her hair that mattered. It was the impact she had on my aspirations that opened my eyes to what it meant to have a powerful partner. Furthermore it was the impact I had on her aspirations, where I understood the importance of companionship and its role in life.
Your identity has its strengths and its weaknesses, knowing these traits help you succeed in every aspect of your life and therefore very important to understand when getting into a relationship. You must find and be a partner that contributes to self-assurance.
Where I was angry she was calm, where she suffered doubt I offered confidence, where I lacked patience she had time. To put it simply, where one was weak the other was strong and it was always about balancing out the weaker components of each other’s identity that made the bond strong.
Being in a relationship does have a bigger purpose to serve and the strength of your identity will establish what you have to gain and what you have to offer.
A powerful partnership goes beyond your interests and hobbies, far from the music you like and what you share in common. As far as I've experienced, they’re just conveniences that fill moments in living everyday life. Take all that away and what are you truly left with? What purpose does the relationship serve?
Don’t allow yourself to be influenced by individuals desperate to find each other, but have yet to find themselves. Continue to learn more about yourself and grow to know what it is you have to gain from a relationship, and how a relationship will guide you closer towards a life of fulfillment.