Moving from One Goal to the Next: Relinquishing Doubt

Goals

There’s a lot of material out there that talks about setting goals and aiming high, even my blog carries this re-occurring theme. This time, I wanted to write to those that are on the verge of hitting a goal, as I am on the verge of accomplishing one of mine.

Like many goal oriented people, we become solely focused on accomplishing the task at hand and just like the time that seems to escape us, our emotions do too.

I’m close to finishing my very first book. I’m becoming to get a little nervous now, because all my spare time was dedicated to writing; my focus was set on getting it finished, that very little thought went into what would happen when I did. Now I’m near the end, I find myself processing all those emotions and thoughts that got buried under my work.

I’m thinking about all those times I said no to going out with friends in order to complete another chapter and all those times I was up late writing and struggled to stroll into work the next day. The outcome of my efforts need to make those compromises worth it, it’s quite intimidating!

These feelings began to overwhelm me and I felt like I would regress to self-doubt.

The decisions I had made, the commitment and dedication I gave to this project were pulled back into debate. I turned down job opportunities, I literally had people waiting for me to submit resumes and I never did. All of these decisions are hitting me now because I chose stick by my aspirations over taking a safer route.

So I did what I always do when I get these feelings of anxiety, I looked back at all my previous accomplishments. Moments in my life when I was at my lowest and moments of greatness. As I reflected I realized these feelings had occurred before; when I quit my job to move abroad, my very first day at university, the time I explored new cities on my own and even the day I started this very blog. I've had a lifetime of experiences to remind me that these feelings are completely normal and I remember why.

I reiterate, fear is a reaction to the lack of control and nobody can control how life is going to work out, but everyone can control what they do with it. I don’t know where my book is going to take me, but I learned that every experience has always led me somewhere and I grew stronger from every experience. The value is: I learned more about myself, the things I am capable of and what I can accomplish if I stay focused and true to my aspirations.

Over the past six years I went from being lost with low self-esteem to self-actualized and confident and I did this by taking full control of every step I made. The day I decided to follow my own passions I was freed from the burden of any expectation and pressure to “settle.” The message is: I have this one life to live right now and I’m not going to waste it by not trying.

Furthermore, this is where surrounding yourself with the right people and always discussing openly about your aspirations pay off.

I tend to become a recluse when I write, but when I am socializing, who I am and what I’m working towards becomes evident right after the question “so what do you do?” Recently I connected with some people who I hadn't spoken to since earlier this year and the majority of them asked me how my book was doing. It was in that moment, a flood of positive energy seized any doubt that I was feeling, because someone held up a mirror and showed me that I can put my mind to anything and accomplish it.

Whichever direction the book goes, I know for certain that I have the ability to write one. The things I’ve learned, the process and what I’ve been through probably mean more to me right now than the final outcome. I’ve learned that no matter what the outcome is, I have the ability to start something and follow it through to the end, teaching me that I can start absolutely anything I want and so can you!

Even though I started off not knowing how to do it, I got it done! So take it from me, be whoever you want to be, tell the world about it and embark on your journey, dedicate your life to your aspirations and free yourself. Doubt may creep up from time to time but on that day you’re forced to look back on your life, I promise you nothing will fill you up with more pride and fulfillment than your accomplished goals.

Whatever the outcome, I’ve already set the next goal to get my book published, so I will make it happen one way or another. This goal that I’m about to complete will highlight the things I need to do to achieve the next and with each goal accomplished, I’m that much closer to my dream.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

 

Terry Sidhu

VanCity Life Coach, Vancouver, BC, Canada